On Valentine’s Day two years ago, my now boyfriend stood me up. I was dressed and waiting only to get no call and no text…but let’s not dwell on the negative. Instead, let me get right to the point. I met my boyfriend, Darius, on Tinder.
Most people find this shocking since the Tinder app is known as a playground for casual encounters rather than meaningful relationships.
I remember when I first came across his profile. I wish I had saved the screenshot! He was wearing a beanie with long dreadlocks hanging underneath. He had on a Pink Panther shirt and was smiling wide with a plastic red cup in his hand. I showed my cousin the photo and she said, “Now that’s a face you could fall in love with.”
Needless to say, I swiped right and promptly found out that we were a match (meaning he had swiped right for me too). After a few witty exchanges via the app, we moved on to texting. Well, I would text him and he would send funny gifs in response. Even then he always found ways to make me laugh. We FaceTime’d one night and that’s when I knew I wanted to move forward and meet him in person for a date. I could sense that we would get along and have a good time.
Our date was set for a Thursday night at a local spot that plays throwback hip-hop. Valentine’s Day was just a couple days prior. We had been texting non-stop and Darius mentioned how funny it would be to have a Tinder date on Valentine’s Day. We decided to hang out that night in addition to keeping our Thursday night date on the books.
As mentioned before, the Valentine’s Day date didn’t happen. He stood me up. The next day, Darius explained that he had family visiting from out of town and after showing them around the city all day, he came home to take a nap and ended up sleeping through the night. (A year later I met said family members who confirmed this story lol.) I could tell he felt really bad which is the only reason I gave him another chance after leaving me hanging. I’m so glad I did.
Darius picked me up for our date on Thursday night. He was blasting the latest Rihanna album, Anti, which we later declared “our album” because we listened to it constantly. It was literally the soundtrack to our love in those early days. We rolled down the windows and sang the lyrics at the top of our lungs as we drove down the street towards the venue. Five minutes in, and I was already having a blast with him.
Once we got there, we stayed downstairs to order drinks and share some fries. He listened attentively as I gave him the details of my day. I remember feeling like I was just blabbering on and on, but he would not take his eye off of mine. He gave me his unwavering attention. The way Darius looked at me with such genuine interest was very telling of his character. I felt our connection beginning to take shape as we sat across from one another at that booth, sipping our drinks and gazing at one another.
We finished our drinks, split the last fry in half, and went upstairs to the dancefloor. Old school hip hop, stylish millennials, and a few break-dancers filled the room. Darius held my hand for the first time as he led me onto the dance floor. We danced together for song after song.
At the very end of the night, the DJ diverged from his throwback playlist to play one last song of the night, Rihanna’s “Work.” I literally jumped up and down with excitement. As I mentioned, Darius and both loved this album and “Work” was the most popular song at the time. In the car on the way over I even said to him, “I guess since it’s throwback night we won’t get to dance to any Rihanna huh?” “I doubt it,” he replied. So as Rihanna’s anthem played, we danced a little closer. Perhaps this was a sign of the good luck we would have together.
When the song was over, we went out to the patio for some fresh air. “What time is it?” I asked, trying to look at his watch. “Time for you to give me a kiss,” he said. I laughed and rolled my eyes at how cheesy his line was, then I stood on my tip-toes as we shared our first kiss. A colony of butterflies fluttered through my body. When he took me home, Darius hugged me tightly and lifted me into the air. As my feet dangled he said, “I can’t wait to see you again!”
We saw each other every day for the next four months. (Our streak was only broken when I had to babysit overnight.) Fast forward two years later. We now live together and have the most balanced, healthy relationship that either one of us has ever experienced (especially via Tinder!). I love cooking for him; he’ll eat anything I make which is nice. I often come home to find him sitting on the couch, folding my laundry (he even folds my underwear!). We kiss every morning and every night. When we get mad at each other, we go for a walk around the neighborhood to talk things out, or just to walk side by side in silence. We never go to bed angry.
We still don’t celebrate Valentine’s Day, and I still give him a hard time about standing me up two years ago. We do celebrate February 17th, the night of our first date, as our anniversary since that truly is the day our relationship began. It’s also why I chose to publish this story today.
I wish I knew the exact date that I swiped right, because that day holds so much significance for both of us as well. In a world full of shallow connections, I am so thankful to have experienced “love at first swipe,” and even more thankful to continue to experience our unique kind of love every single day since.
Happy Anniversary, Darius. I love you!
PIN THIS POST: